Privacy,assumptions and my thoughts
There is a reason I do not want to share personal things espaiclly from the people closest to me that I love with the public. Me sharing information with people from the team that I can not trust at a deep level who can turn against me and share my personal life with the people that want the worst for me and my family is something i never want to do. I shared the situation with Yamato and I inteded to do the same with Hylissang because these were the people I felt I had a genuine trusting relationship with that would not use my weakness and vunerability to create a situation that could be even more hurtful in such difficult times. I dont want to have to expose anyone close to me to people saying terrible things aobout things that happen in the private life of my family because I know how fast people in this industry can spread such information. there will always be people online that will try anything to hurt you and the people around me and it is my upmost priority to keep that from happeing as much as i can. I belive everyone has a right to privacy and I could not tell people i dont fully trust what the situation is. Hyli knew me well enough as a person and how much i care about competing that he did not even want to know anything and I know people like yamato and hyli are friends for life. regarding people writing things about my wife has been by far the most sad and hurtful part for me and her in this. she would never ask me to leave worlds and she has been nothing but supportive. people attacking her based of assumptions when they do not have any insight are really the worst and do not think for a second that there is a real human and that what you are doing is just very hurtful and disgusting. I understood that not being open with the private life of me and my loved ones could lead to mistrust and I would understand if people would not want to play with me but purposefully assuming things with bad intentions is really the lowest of the lows and i will restrain myself from talking about my experince working with Adam but i am honestly shocked he would send this much hate and abuse towards the direction of my wife without knowing anything because of his personal frustrations. Saying the last thing I told my team that my wife is just feeling bad so I need to leave is an outright lie. I shared with the team the deep pain and sadness i was going through in this time, I shared that i wish i could tell them if it was about something that happend to me but that i have to keep private traumatic events from my family private because it is difficult enough to deal with the hardships life brings, there is no need to have the most toxic enviorment of social media and the people that hate you most target you with exactly these painful hardships. I have a right to privacy and especially i have to protect the privacy of the people clostest to me even if that could mean that someone would not want to play with me or an organization would chose not to work with me. I work extremely hard and people around me know how much I care about this so assuming petty reasons once again from someone inside the team, not talking to me directly about it now acting like everything was okay when we talked and saying something like this is just shocking and dissapoiting to say the least. Imagine the terrible things that can happen to you or in the life of your loved ones, would you like to read about it in twitch chat or get messages on social media making fun of you with bad intentions?And I also expressed feeling sorry leaving the team in the event especially with not being able to share but how can I trust the people that I do not have a very close personal relationship with not to spread the information if I share everything that happend during this time.
On a completely different note :
Alphari asked to speak with me after initiating talks with Fnatic due to our history as teammates and friends, which of course is a natural progression for any player looking to join any organisation. Fnatic management take the decisions for what players to sign and I was simply asked to give feedback on someone and to speak to them. To no ones shock, I want to be surrounded by players that I believe will make the best team. I have been as transparent as I can be with my teammates in this post-season.
I feel very emotinal with all of this and I understand his frustrations very well. But how should I trust people with the most personal things if i do not have a close relationship to them and the trust is not there. Just because we are teammates does not mean I can trust you with my the life of my loved ones if you have shown me 0 reason to belive so. And with all of this i think this point is very clear. I am sure there a lot more things to add but i just wanted to share with the hope that less people are using this situation to do hurtful things and understand my point of view and how everyone has a right to privacy and should not be judged so harshly based on pure bad intentioned speculations which he admits are just speculations. also him saying he does not give a shit about my privacy because he worked hard is another great reason why I would never want to share something which occured.