pansy

Lauren Scott 🎃 · @pansy

31st Aug 2020 from TwitLonger

My future with casting CSGO


So i wanted to let you all know about my schedule coming up and what that means for me casting CSGO. Cologne was incredibly special and also slightly terrifying for multiple reason, but i think its best to start with why i initially stopped wanted to cast CSGO. People sometimes make the assumption is was just how toxic the scene was at the time but there was a lot going on behind the scenes that made me decide to focus elsewhere for awhile.

WHY I LEFT:

1 Without going into detail i am not comfortable with, i was very underpaid compared to my direct colleagues which was instantly a motivational drain on me.
2 There was a real top end barrier i simply wasn't going to get through (My first final was one of my last events, literally never got given the chance until IEM Sydney) casted 24 S tier events prior.
3 then throw in the toxic part of the community, like im talking trying to find where i live and death threats sort of toxic.

WHY PUBG:

So with all that above, it was the breath of fresh air in PUBG that really caught my attention. I was able to be more myself, find comfort and freedom in my job. I was able to get a great co-caster from the very start and we instantly had good on-air chemistry and to not sound like a dickhead we made a very technically poor show (10000's of issues)seem very good fun. It put is in a great position and we got to do the finals. Which after being looked over for 24s tier events, felt fucking fantastic. On top of that the PUBG community were i guess slightly older? i felt like we actually could have a laugh and felt like it was really understood.

RETURN?

For me it feels like when you come back home for Christmas to your old home town that you grew up in. I love CSGO and i always will, it is one of the best esports there is without hesitation. My problems are me being jaded, i don't like the amount of mental and emotional ties that still make me be a worse person when it comes to casting CSGO sometimes.

I will be treating it like the school friends i once loved. We will still stay in touch and go out for an event or two but i hope i never become the kid who couldn't leave their hometown.

TLDR : CSGO makes me emo sometimes but I will be around for a couple more events and might pop back when there is an opportunity that i feel i can have fun with.

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