VroZone

Vro 🌃 · @VroZone

3rd Jul 2020 from TwitLonger

re: Vro [Please speak up if I have been emotionally abusive / misogynistic]


This story is partially true (not the recordings part) and this person is not in the Smash community so I will keep her anonymous by calling her Jane.

I met Jane 2013 in our senior year in college and asked her to be my roommate. We were not romantically involved but we went to school together, lived together, and eventually worked together... so it was very easy for us to get on each other's nerves.

While I don't have any memories of intentionally being malicious towards Jane, we did have differing attitudes on a lot of things and had many disagreements. We were in a small startup and the stress of decision making fed into my daily thoughts. I admit I was not a particularly fun person to be around post college and I was delusional over game design. I eventually stopped working with my graduating peers and fizzled out of game design entirely.

Rewind a little bit: about a half year after graduating, Jane and I moved from my condo to a house on the northside of Chicago to have more room and an additional roommate: John (anonymous) who was another peer from our graduating class.

Within a few months of living on the northside, I fizzled out of game design, and Jane and John started to work for an indie game dev studio in Chicago. I remember being very happy for them, because job stability in game design is so hard and we were just in a scrappy startup. I felt responsible for our startup being so bad and I didn't want to work at the indie studio, so I just wanted to be happy for them from a distance.

Eventually, I moved back to live alone in my condo and started Melee Everyday the next year. I haven't spoke to Jane or John since 2014.

I don't have any records of my conversations with Jane, but there's no doubt that I was difficult to work with and live with. I know my relationship with Jane was the worst friend/roommate relationship I've ever had and that we spoke about how damaged our relationship had became before I moved back to my condo. It was our poor relationship that prompted me to move out.

If there has to be a good guy and bad guy to each story, I was the bad guy. I didn't think I was bad to the extent Jane is saying, but I don't have a right to downplay her perspectve. Here are some things I am certain of: 1) Jane and I lived with each other our senior year in college in my condo near campus. 2) I moved to the northside with Jane and John after we graduated. 3) Our game design startup fizzled out, but Jane and John both got jobs and I was happy for them. 4) I moved out when I realized Jane and I were never gonna be friends again.

As far as the hidden cameras and key strokes thing, these allegations are plainly false. If you've watched my stream or know me in person, I really am not that tech savvy. And it's crazy to violate someone's privacy like that. I don't have any recordings and can't really provide a lack of evidence. Juna lived with me and at one time when I lost a sum of money, I had no idea what happened in my small condo. It's a pretty serious allegation but I don't know how to really disprove this besides saying I'm actually bad with technology and I don't have any desire to be malicious/deviant? I can't even operate the ME streams at majors. I'm that bad at technology. I don't know how to install hidden cameras or key loggers and have never done it.

And I have no idea about a restraining order against me. Can I have one placed against me but not know about it?

I can say with a lot of confidence that my poor relationship with Jane permanently changed how I approach interpersonal relationships and that I, like everyone, is constantly growing.

Shortly after living alone I met Juna and started Melee Everyday. Juna lived with me for 3-4 years and can vouch for my character. I was extremely cautious on how to proceed with Juna because it was another roommate/startup situation, but we were lucky and ME is what it is today in large part due to Juna.

I've worked with a handful of women in the Smash scene since starting ME and I have never been unprofessional or emotionally abusive. I will definitely say that I am no saint, I am not perfect and that I probably have had good and bad interactions with many of you. All I can say is that I have confidence that if I ask the women of Smash and of the FGC what they think of my character, it is not one of a malicious abuser.

And while not everyone thinks the girlfriend excuse counters misogyny, I have been extremely supportive of the girls I have dated and they have been supportive of me. My close friends in Chicago are familiar with how I've handled myself and past girlfriends and they can all vouch that I am not an abuser.

To everyone: this story is partially true; I admit I was a bad friend and peer. However I deny recording Jane and I do not believe I have "continued this cycle of abuse with other women." I strongly urge anyone who believes differently to speak up. I believe in accountability and I also believe in growth.

To Jane: It takes a lot of strength to share and relive the things you're describing. I was a bad friend, peer, colleague, roommate... everything really. It probably doesn't make a difference that I didn't intend for these things. I was sorry when I moved out and I'm still sorry now. I hope your post helps you heal and I agree that no one should be put through the pain you've felt. I learned a lot from the 1.5 years I knew ya and I hope I will never hurt you again. I learned a lot and I'm still sorry.

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Please speak up if I have been emotionally abusive / misogynistic. Please share if you had a positive or negative experience working with me. This happened 6 years ago and I believe I have changed for the better since then. Thanks for reading.

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