Steve Ye · @XcaliburYe

26th May 2020 from TwitLonger

About my time with B8

Hi everyone!

The parting probably comes to no surprise since our results has been bad. I don’t think our results are because we had bad players, I think we just had unlucky circumstances. We were invited to lots of tournaments in a row against the best teams in the european & cis region without enough preparation. Once we started losing a lot of games it was hard to recover because of lack of time to practice between the tournaments. How it felt during this rushed period was that we play a series, we lost and we need to think about what to improve on for us to have better results in the next series but the only time we had to try our new ideas was in the next series. We had a lot of games we could’ve, should’ve won but a mix of lack of practice and taking psychological damage from accumulated losses we were not able to play our game. This also unfortunately lead to us having to replace 2 of our players in the middle of it all which only made it worse.

This was an extremely difficult time for me and my teammates. The only thought that kept me going was the fact in all movies and series the main character is always the underdog and is bad in the beginning but there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. This was also the first time since i graduated high school that I checked how many engineering courses I was eligible. I experienced a burnout for the first time in years where I didn’t feel like playing the game at all and I was trying to find any reason to not touch the game.

During this period I felt lost and I started watching more twitch and youtube than usual. I stumbled upon the healthygamer channel again and for the first time in a long time I felt like I had the time to commit to a couple of 2 hour long videos. Even though all these cases were different from mine I could find parts of them that helped me understand what I was going through and made me feel better. Although april was a hard month for me I grew a lot as a person and learned a lot about myself in and outside of dota.

Now that I’m recovering from all the psychological damage i took during april, I’ll start playing lots of pubs again to practice what I’ve learned and stream my journey. I’m still determined to make it to the end of the tunnel.

Lastly I would like to give a shoutout to Dendi. He was the most hungry player in this team for success even though he has already proved himself in the past and has a place in the hall of fame. Not only that but he was also the most mentally strong player in this team and kept us going during a difficult time. I expect him to reach the top again in the correct environment and I’m sorry that I couldn’t help him with that.

TLDR: lack of time to practice lead to bad results, learned lots of things i never thought about and I’m looking to stream until I find a team I want to play with.

Thanks for reading and also thanks for all the support during this time, it has been extremely important. My stream is at www.twitch.tv/xcaliburye if you’re interested in following my journey. I also answer questions between games if you have any questions regarding climbing mmr.

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