please read this whole thing. no tl;dr

Hi everyone.I figured this would happen, just didn't expect it now.
One thing I'd like to clear up is that I never told ally id expose him if he desired to leave me, I touch briefly on this later in this statement.
This twitlonger is in no way trying to defend my actions. Im simply explaining the story. I apologize to Nairo and Zackray for ruining the integrity of competition and to the entire community for letting my personal relationship affect an entire result.
The truth is I told Ally to throw to Zackray at Prime saga, and Nairo at Momocon. .
The reason was because when I was doing poorly in tournament I was watching him always perform well and get top 8 placings when I believed he should not have been allowed to play. We were together while I was 16, and during that time I was uncomfortable for almost the entire thing. I was constantly told to not tell anyone about the relationship and it'd be bad for both of us etc. When he found out I told tamim he got very angry at me and said it's my fault things are going wrong etc. Tamim tried telling me to leave him, but I never listened until he told me to think of what my family would say. I decided to end the relationship at Dreamhack Montreal, and that was the first tournament I started getting frustrated at the fact he was able to play.
Fast forward to Let's Make Moves.
I'm in a very dark place, I literally feel like Ult is not my game and they just destroyed my character. I lost in bracket and I go outside and message ally to come outside so i can cope. He agrees and says shouldnt we not be together anymore. I just say i dont care anymore because of the emotional turmoil I was in. Every tourney after that I would progressively get more and more upset with him in general. I would purposely be mean to him in hopes he would leave me, because i just didnt want to end the relationship again. then at prime saga i told him to throw to zackray. then momocon happened and same thing vs nairo.
I'm really sorry for what I did and I know it was wrong. The thing about all of this though is that Ally and I have talked about it and we understand each other's side. We both decided to let the throwing situation go, yet somehow it was leaked to that twitter account and they decided to post it without either of our consent. Ally told me he doesn't want the account to post this shit, I don't understand why it's being brought up publicly and not handled by the Code of Conduct.
I didn't have to post this as all "evidence" was speculative, but I thought it was the right thing to do. After posting this I'll take a small break from posting so much on twitter, and I really want us all to start taking steps forward from simply just wanting to cancel people regardless of the victim's(me or ally for different reasons) wishes. I vow to never try to manipulate a match result again and the case of me is being looked at and being dealt with. I hope the twitter account just drops this

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