xou · @xouboudou
19th Jul 2021 from TwitLonger
Apologies and goodbye
It is time for me to put an end to my involvement in the Overwatch esport community. But before that, I must take responsibility and try to make amends for my past actions and words.
Sunday 18th July, a tweet came up with a screenshot of an unacceptable discussion I had 5 years ago. My words were incredibly careless and stupid at the time. They wrongly illustrates my opinions as I will always strongly disagree with any form of racism. I regret them and feel deeply sorry for the pain they have caused. There is absolutely no excuse and I prefer to step away if my presence in the community creates unease. This will be the opportunity for me to think hard and learn to show more respect.
Wednesday 14th July, I came to make a harsh decision during Contenders NA July as the lobby admin for the Noble vs Ardour match. At the beginning of the last round of the deciding map, a player from Noble had a power cut and the team had to call a pause. I was convinced my role was to strictly enforce the rules regarding pause time at this moment. But given the stakes and the timing of the disconnection, I should have showed more flexibility and better communication with the tournament production regarding the options to consider. I failed to find the right balance in my decision making for a satisfying conclusion for all parties involved, including the fans, in this match. For this I sincerely apologize to everyone, especially to the players and staff involved in this match who worked hard and invested their time and efforts to be part of the competition. Again, I have no excuses.
I will now cease my tournament administration activities in Overwatch. My actions and words have caused too much embarrassment and troubles for my former colleagues who have been working hard to build a good show this year. I also offer my apologies to each one of them. I know my actions and words have big consequences in their work today and I'm ashamed for this, and for everything else.
My native language isn't English, but I decided I must write this text alone. I'm still afraid my wording can be awkward, be sure I have one simple goal here: to apologize and express my regrets to the people I've hurt.