cleo 🇲🇽 · @cIe0h
18th May 2021 from TwitLonger
todays update
ill start by saying that i never once told him to delete the video, i did not care whatsoever if he kept it or not. i thought he still had it and i told the riot investigators that i welcomed him showing the video because in it you can see his fingers dig into me when i try and move away from him. he took the video and he sent it to me, it was just in our text thread because i never delete texts.
i wouldve shared the video if it had been requested of me but it wasnt. i complied completely with the investigation to the extent that it was asked which was honestly very little.
i personally don't care for his "apology" or his "reflecting" and don't care for the fact that my posting about the abuse i faced at his hands "humbled" him. there's no apology that he can give me that will mean anything to me. if he had genuinely reflected then he wouldn't be making jokes about coming back "soon!!!". if he was truly humbled he would understand that making a statement about growing from "this", when the "this" in question was emotionally and sexually abusing me, is completely inappropriate.
i don't care if he has grown and become a better person through me detailing the way he abused me to the public because the person he was when he was with me, whether he's grown or not, already did enough damage.
so yes he refused to comply with the investigation, was caught in multiple lies and didn't give a video that wouldn't have proved his innocence. he gave an apology that i will never at any point in my life be accepting because it is entirely too late. the legal aspect will develop slowly and depends entirely on my emotional strength when it comes to dealing with law enforcement and detectives which has so far been one of the most traumatizing things i've done in my life.
this has been a very upsetting past few months and while i am very lucky to have a wonderful support system and i've learned to accept this new reality, it has still been hard. in posting the very first document i truly just wanted people to see him the way that i saw him and maybe a few peoples opinions would be changed. i never imagined it would be this significant. i also deleted the second document because the screenshots weren't cropped correctly and truthfully i did post it out of anger that people were so excited to see him back playing. i won't apologize for being angry that so many people seemed like they had just forgotten what he'd done because i dont think that's an unreasonable thing to be upset about.
i want to be able to move on from this and just exist like i always have in the past and talk about the overwatch league with my friends without getting death threats and called a whore. i hope people can understand that if he was truly innocent he would have complied with the investigation like he said he was going to in the first place, but instead he lied to the investigators and refused to participate.
thats all im going to say on this. thanks for reading and for those of you who have been kind to me over the past few months, i truly appreciate it.