Response to Mira & Confession.
I'm on break at work right now so I'm sorry if I miss any details but I'm going to be as blunt as possible from my perspective.
I'm sorry. Deeply I am. Her and I technically met at ssc 2017, we played a set in bracket there and that was it. Months later I started talking to someone named Skya. She was cool, and showed interest in me at first. It felt nice, but eventually her interest dropped and it showed pretty obviously. However, I persisted and got very creepy with her. Skya is not a minor, but I am very deeply sorry to her too. I don't have screenshots of what I said but it was essentially me being desperate.
Despite this she let me join her discord server. This is where I met Mira. We were talking about ssc last year and she mentioned she recognized my tag. We talked a bit about ssc and I eventually dm'ed her. I knew she was 16 pretty much right away. I was trying to remember who she was and I couldn't. Mira would talk about her home life a lot and how much she hated it. Hence where the conversations of moving out come from. I was trying to help her get away from that. Did it come off differently? Yes. I made her uncomfortable and I didn't even realize. Let me stress that I was interested in her for what she liked. Music, tech etc. Not her age. I've been in awkward experiences with minors before irl and there's just no way I'd be comfortable doing anything to do them in any way. In regards to mentioning dates, there's literally no excuse for that that was some dumb shit to say and I'm so deeply sorry to Mira for that. We talked it out, and after speaking with Skya on the matter as well I sought therapy. I did therapy for 6 months and it helped.
Now the confession,
Last year around June I began talking to another girl named Misa/Mika idk what she goes by anymore. She was depressed so I wanted to help her. Yes, I know looking back it was very predatory. Her and I talked for a few months , she was 14 I was 22. It go veryyy weird on both sides but as the adult I didn't stop it. I should have. I talked with Misa yesterday about this, and to Misa I'm sorry if seeing Mira's story makes you think I lied when I said it was never this bad with anyone else. I legitimately cant remember all that happened with Misa but I regret it deeply. I think it's the worst thing that's happened with me and it was more of a wake-up call then the Mira situation.
Let me just say this- I wasn't trying to groom minors for sexual encounters. That's not who I am. It's okay to think that, I don't make it easy to believe otherwise. I've never touched any minors physically, and I haven't done anything like this in a lil over a year. I'm trying my best.
Those who stick with me thanks. Those who don't that's okay. People like me, and people who do what I did back then deserve to be punished. It's disgusting.
Thanks for reading, I really appreciate it.