cumgod420

hhh · @cumgod420

28th Jun 2020 from TwitLonger

My experiences in smash: misogyny, queerphobia, ableism, and consent


i did this for an interview in an article, this is my full piece . I hope you can read it fully and understanding, this is what inexperienced as a result of all my identities overlapping and how smash and beyond greater society traumatized me but also growth
1
What is your full name and what are your pronouns?

you can call me charley or char . i use they/them primarily and i love he/him, she/her is fine too. Im gender queer, i experience both dysphoria and euphoria in different instances. Im also bisexual but lean towards noncis men


2
How long have you been involved with the Melee community?

i been in the melee community since like 2016, been playing for forever/ played nonstop in 2015 (was getting to be an issue) w ppl who were casuals and ppl who compete, and ppl who dont compete but practice tech skill.


3
“Gamers as a whole are generally more progressive because we’re all sorta weird.” - DoH, The Smash Brothers documentary, 2013

Based on your experiences in gaming communities, do you agree with this sentiment? Why or why not?

LOOOOL i mean . LOOOOL LMMFKDKS
i mean the gaming community is primarily white, straight, and cis male. being nonwhite, nonstraight, etc isn’t “weird” it’s just different . and i tend to find that in groups where the majority is male and white etc then sexism and racism and transphobia is usually more pervasive and normalized, unaccounted for. i’ve definitely had my fair share of exp where i think being a woman or read as a woman has led to annoying and frustrating experiences, and ive also had to expect violence to make myself prepared because many other women have experienced violence too. and then there’s twitch chat LOL
ok back to ur questions ,

so my experiences are varied . recently i’ve been treated much better, despite being a sex worker now as i’ve established myself as a person instead of a “new girl” which i think is the hardest.
if you enter the community sucking, which HONESTLY should be expected bc this game is hard and it takes active dedication. i tend to find that women who don’t exhibit those skills get extra pressure to excel out of stereotype threat and fear of toxicity .
i’ve had dudes be really condescending to me, have ppl give me unsolicited advice at much higher rates and also flirt w me at the same time. This is disorienting as is but hits me differently i feel, as someone who is primarily attracted to women and also gender queer .
i’ve had guys ask an ex of mine when we would have a threesome.
i’ve had a guy constantly give me advice on things i already know, on things i’m currently attempting to execute very clearly, that are super basic for who i was maining, AS i was DOMINATING the rotation. and this entire time NO advice was given to the guy that lost EVERY GAME. i was tilted but too nervous at the time to stand up for myself. i didn’t wanna be labeled as a bitch, especially since back then i didn’t feel confident that my group of friends or really anyone actually liked me. I felt I needed to be socially acceptable.
i struggled w trust issues that anyone who was friends with me was only friends w me because of my ex, or because they wanted to fuck me. i had been talked over and dismissed several times, and anytime i addressed things were fucked up, i was always blamed for them, blamed for being bothered/hurt, and blamed for not being “as chill” as other women. i was constantly compared to other girls in my scene.
i remember one of my first experiences with the smash scene online was being in a facebook group and the recent topic was “why there weren’t more women in PM” i’m a melee player, but i felt the reasons overlapped. i named the sexual harassment i’ve gotten, how stereotype plays a role, and that the environment prevents women from coming and also exhausts the players already present and kicks them out . higher cases of sexual assault as well, and sexual assault is almost never taken seriously and becomes hyper public. I was constantly dismissed.
in that same thread i saw people talk bullshit bio essentialist arguments, saying things like “women aren’t built for competition, women are naturally nurturing and were built for picking berries. men were built for hunting and naturally have faster reaction times.” not only do these claims lead to zero change in the culture of the scene and the culture of gender roles, it’s also very bullshit. it is extremely naive to base so much thinking and role performance down to gender, when our understanding of gender is binary and largely socialized instead of actual science. and even then it’s important to question human attempts to gain scientific “truth,” when we are inherently biased and a lot of scientific studies are pushed depending on agendas. anyways, i’m just saying that basing disparities in communities in biology is over simplified and very often wrong, and leads to no accountability, and is based in sexist ideas.

i even have a hard time talking about this stuff because using words like sexism and privilege have become such “sjw” buzzwords, that makes ppl tune out quickly. it’s easy for ppl to dismiss me without actually listening and it’s frustrating . it’s like playing a game of taboo begging ppl to empathize. i end up over explaining to avoid this and i’m sure ppl tune out too. i struggle to find ways around this

i remember i replied to one comment in a fb group on how to get melee discs for cheap. a guy added me and my naive ass who had zero friends at the time replied to his messages. i was naive and talked about my bisexuality (i had just come out to myself on my loving women) and he unicorn hunted me. he also kept sending me pictures of his car ? and kept over stepping my boundaries and then insulted me when i told him he needs to stop? and also kept trying to get me to carpool w him to san jose for genesis.. also kept bragging about his money lowkey and kept talking about how i should come over to play melee and he would teach me the game lol he would talk about how he spent 500 on money matches w mang0 and finally got a game. him talking about his nice car and money and two “nice” places he lives at made me really uncomfortable. especially the stepping over boundaries and how he kept trying to set me up w this girl so he could watch, as i kept saying how uncomfortable i was. Im pretty sure he was catfishing me too because he would never give me her number and told me how she thought i was cute and send me pics of her?? But then whenever i would ignore him he would say “oh do you not want her? You dont want her number?” and then never give it to me LOOOL and i kept saying how my love for women is really just my love for women, not a spectacle for men to fetishize. Im just tryna love and date lol. i should have blocked him way long ago but like i said, i was naive and had no friends and i over fixate in communicating in relationships.

I remember my first times in a tournament, i went to a PM one accidentally bc of misinformation/lack of but i played on a melee set up w someone. this dude kept laughing as he ledge hogged and then did some cheesy gimmick to kill me when i approached . shit was annoying LOL i mean i gotta learn how to get around that but when you’re a new player, massively stoned on edibles, and the only girl in the room, you can imagine the impression and feelings i gained from that LOL

my first bigger tourney was an arcadian in norcal, and my first friendlies was w an icies player who wobbled me every round. i didn’t have the confidence or social skills to know that i could just leave whatever set up . also wasn’t skilled enough to know how to get around . i was also in a room of about 300 ppl and i saw about 5 other girls there. A very alienating feeling

i remember talking about trump raping a child w one of my melee friends . he got defensive about it and kept victim blaming . kept saying “she should have gone to the police” and i had to keep repeating myself that the police don’t take rape victims seriously, that they often traumatize and victimize rapists. i kept getting ignored and talked over

i remember one of my first times playing friendlies in my scene , a guy i was playing with kept talking about me, in front of me, in the third person to his friends behind me. idk how to explain it well, but it was a really weird feeling . “i wonder if she knows how to do x!” “omg she just did x lol” it was jarring to not be talked directly to and instead talked about right in front of me and made to be a spectacle as ppl laughed and jeered . i also didn’t really have any friends at the time, i felt incredibly alone .

i remember when i would talk about my exp online in threads to try to draw attention to the issue, i was told i was lying, that i was just looking for attention, that hyper visibility is fine bc it helps w twitch streams?? the lying thing only got taken back after another man stepped in and said maybe it’s too far.

I remember my excitement in joining a local melee groupchat, but everyone kept bragging about the “hoes” they were sleeping with. My patience ended when a guy posted a creepy pic of some girls ass, she didnt look like she even knew the pic was being taken, and its in a groupchat of 40 people. I called him out on it. I was told the community is better off without me. I could have handled different things in that better, I remember he was sad because a girl saw his computer and left him after. It was definitely a violation of his privacy but I was more focused on how he was kinda gross to girls. If i could go back in time i think i would try to support both, or recognizetiming better. Things are awk between us now sorta, but i keep it polite and so does he. I left the group chat, it was too much.

i remember crying in the bathroom at several tournaments, or silently crying while i play and hoping no one could see. i would beat myself up over my play, hyper focused on how i wasn’t good enough, that i couldn’t play the way i wanted to. i felt that ppl seeing would be evidence that women were inferior, i felt a burden on my shoulders to disprove all of these common deeply ingrained beliefs. it felt as if that if i didn’t disprove ppl, then maybe they were right about me and they were justified to do these things. i couldn’t allow it for my sanity and for fear of seeing others treated that way.

Tw mental illness, unreality
i suffer from bipolar 1, and some of bipolar 1 symptoms is intense depressive episodes and also intense manic episodes, changing fairly suddenly. manic symptoms can also include hallucinations that lead to intense paranoia. i heard voices that would make me feel unsafe. By the way, in the instances i am citing are experiences i KNOW to be true, but i am mentioning this to give an understanding of how unsafe i was. I know some experiences to be true bc of direct communication and physical evidence. The voices i would hear would be ppl chattering around me, laughing or gossiping about me. They would be hyper clear and vivid, but I learned ways to ground myself but struggled immensely. My experiences in the melee community did not help me heal . healing was a serious battle. i was in the most traumatized time of my life, dealing w relationship trauma after watching someone i loved suffer w homelessness and mental institutions, drug abuse and also sexual assault from someone i also met thru melee. i will talk about this later, but melee was always something i used as a coping mechanism.
Melee was something i turned to as a coping mechanism and functioning in a community environment felt near impossible. Engaging in the community was so much harder bc of the constant condescension, the hyper sexualizing, the girlfriendzoning, and the alienation. it was hard to feel like i had anyone bc of my severe trust issues and there being almost no women or non hetero men . I felt if i trusted ppl, who were almost all cisheteromen, that I would let myself be hurt/taken advantage of, as I already had a few times. Trust issues were a defense mechanism for me, but made me terribly alone at the same time. i also had a really hard time establishing boundaries due to trauma, so i felt unsafe without tools to make me feel secure. i really only felt safe w a boyfriend but my ability to feel comfortable performing heterosexuality is very disorienting for me. I dont think ive felt fully secure dating men monogamously for the past 5 years to be honest, although i appreciate all of my exes as wonderful ppl in their own ways, flaws and all. But it was not for me. Relying on heterosexuality for different varieties of social safety was disorienting when it never aligned with me spiritually. It felt forced and performative. it was a really weird dynamic personally

i think the only thing that kept me in melee is my love for the game. i also wanted badly to be a part of the community, but melee was a game i turned to as a coping mechanism. Melee was honestly an addiction, I struggled to take care of myself sometimes because I would play the game all day. It took my mind off of homelessness and the alienation it brings and struggles w sanity both w me and someone close to me. When i would experience audio hallucinations or severe social anxiety I often immediately turned to melee to focus myself and ground myself. Melee saved me in a lot of ways, I vice I think i will forever be thankful for. I fucking love this game, dont think i can ever genuinely complain about it, flaws and all. Community needs work tho 4 sure LOL

on the topic of toxicity, i read from an article on like kotaku or something, can’t remember, but it said something that stuck out to me. Basically, despite overall experiences not being toxic, having enough experiences can lead to an expectation of toxicity. Expecting toxicity kept me safe because I could put up walls, but it also meant having to passively, constantly be afraid to varying degrees. i had an expectation of toxicity, especially because i didn’t really have a support group that i felt completely comfortable in, and i had seen and faced so much harassment.

this is a small comment i got a lot, but i remember being told “wow i wasn’t expecting you to be good. most girls that are pretty sick at the game lol” that comment is annoying. statements that compare women to others, whether it be “putting up” or putting down suck.

i remember making meme to poke fun at a guy who made a tier list ranking women . this was in melee hell. this dude ranked women but called them “grils” so i made a literal grill tier list. he didn’t get that i was trying to roast him, and when i got serious about my intentions and why it wasn’t a good idea, ppl kept thinking i was being ironic. it’s like, all conversations about misogyny are so memeified and not taken seriously that we can’t even talk about it . the dude also flirted w me the whole time . super bizarre

Apparently melee hell is a lot better now or something, but imma be honest, i dont think i care enough to engage anymore. To the mods of MH, please stop namesearching me. Its honestly a little too reminiscent of when I would address seriously annoying issues in it, get name searched, and then dog piled for saying something is fucked up. It spikes a fight or flight response for me, and i would really appreciate if melee hell mods would shut the fuck up. Sorry to be rude but its honestly too much and i gotta set some boundaries. Good on you guys for doing better and addressing stuff,taking action, but when i was excited to join a group about shitposting/memes/melee (MY FAVORITE) it was awful to see so much casual (trans)misogyny, and racism, and it sucked that whenever i tried to talk about it casually i was ignored/dismissed/seen as a joke. When i tried to talk about it seriously i was dogpiled and dismissed too, much more aggressively. I had close to no support, i think i remember one person (we later became friends, but her claims were kinda ignored by others) and one guy who was taken more seriously than mine. Ppl made tier lists about women and it was largely encouraged, some disapproved it, sure. But my point is that misogyny and transmisogyny, along w other toxic mindsets, were encouraged enough and given a platform to exist and be supported. Voices that spoke out were often silenced unless they came from reputable sources. I often found those “reputable” sources to be men lol.
Again in melee hell, holy shit!! there were SOOOO many “pick me’s”. So many girls would be like “THIS ISNT AN ISSUE!! I NEVER EXPERIENCED THIS!!! THIS IS OVER REACTING!!!” like cool! Im glad you never got to experience this. I did !! a lot!!! Same for people i know!!! I know a lot of people that have to face alienation/mistreatment to straight up sexual assault and then public condemnation!!! Its frustrating to see that when women align themselves w misogyny, that their voices are considered “more valid” than those who suffer and choose to speak out. The voices of “pick me’s” are celebrated by misogynistic men.


Tw rape!!
I remember one of the first times I hosted at my house, I slept with a guy I thought was cute. We fucked a few times but I was catching feelings and more intimate than he was, so he pushed me away and was kinda condescending. I felt this and it sucked, and didnt really make sex a thing I desired. I got high with him when I shouldnt have, getting high was getting really bad for my brain. I ended up having really traumatizing “sex” with him when I was too intoxicated to be present, and the escalation to sex was so quick I struggled to really make sense of it. I reacted by dissociating. I remember laying there and being in pain and just focusing on the ceiling and wishing for it to be over. I remember not being present in my body, and I remember not remembering. I told myself as this was happening that this was the correct choice of action for me, to dissociate and lend my body to another for their enjoyment, instead of risking conflict and enforcing a boundary. This was my first traumatic assault, and led to feelings of self hate and I coped with hypersexuality and to gain control of my trauma and experience. Im much better now, and I genuinely dont think my rapist was “malacious” but I think his lack of communication and not checking in on me, the hyperescalation and lack of enthusiastic consent while i was intoxicated, is something that is common and needs to stop. I shouldnt have been traumatized. He shouldnt have to hurt someone or think this was an ok thing. We did talk later and i gained the strength to tell him itwasnt ok and to be more conscious later. Its all the strength I have for that incident.

i have to say that my experiences have gotten much better. i’m in a better mental space, and i know that a really big catalyst for that is to finally have friends i trust. i especially shout out to my lgbt+ friends, and the women i know, and also the ppl in my local scene that are fun, understanding , and easy to talk to. i think also as ppl w more social power talk about these issues seriously, and listen to victims whole heartedly, giving ppl platforms has helped to change culture little by little. it was harder at first but i think after a while of coming out of my shell, being taken more seriously as a player, and also learning to talk more was really helpful. i started to earn my name beyond just “new single girl in melee who sucks”. i still have a lot to work on and my play isn’t consistent at all but i’m happy to be acknowledged in a way where i’m no longer afraid . i’m also more mentally stable as a bipolar person and have medication and therapy now. i do my best to offer mental tools that my therapist had offered me, to others .


4
“You’re not helping girls get into the gaming community at all by using terminology like “r***”” - Milktea, TSB, 2013


The Melee community has been long plagued with misogynistic language, as often seen and briefly addressed in the documentary in regards to the term “r***” being thrown around in a gross and insensitive context.

This past week, Smash Twitter had a field day when a Tweet made by a member of the Ultimate community, in which he referred to a pictured woman as one of Dabuz’s “hoes” for no reason, went viral and had voices from every facet of the community (mostly) condemning the language and tone of the tweet.

“I really like the fact that [Melee] brings together people from every walk of life... except girls, but we’ll work on that too.” - Chillindude, TSB, 2013

Since then, do you think the community has worked on its openness towards women enough? What should we start or continue doing to be more inclusive and welcoming towards women in the community?


Ok that whole out of context pic of Dabuz really annoyed me LOLL.The original image is deleted, but it showed someone named Dabuz talking to a girl and he was sitting down, looking relaxed and talking, and the girl talking was smiling and talking to him. She was also in cosplay. I think the tweet said something about “Dabuz being cool, casually getting hoes” which is hella paraphrasing but I remember my issues with it. Its frustrating to have a picture taken without consent and an implied romantic/sexual relationship. Its annoying to be called a hoe and for someone elses social gain, and then given an unasked-for platform to be gawked at. One of her close personal friends definitely seemed uncomfortable, and I also know personally that its frustrating to be a (usually cis) woman and always assumed to be dating or flirting with a man. We get punished for that, and a lot of time its just from unnecessary speculation and assumed closeness. A lot of ppl were upset, and there were also ppl thinking its fun and other ppl upset at the ppl who were upset, and so on. He ended up deleting the tweet because she straight-up got harassment, but I get the notion hes defensive and kinda dismissive but Im only getting an impression off of his tweets. Heres a screenshot to get a better understanding
I think in some ways more people are talking about these issues, but in other ways we are falling behind. I’ve noticed a trend of “ironic” misogyny and I find that a lot of the people that practice this struggle to differentiate ironic vs genuine misogyny, and instead perpetuate toxic status quo ideas under the guise of humor. Conversations addressing this is often dismissed, bc of the irony making it a “joke” but the harassment continues to affect victims and cultivate/reveal a culture. It enforces a mindset, which is why I think conversations about the content of humor is important too. I wish for people to engage in humor that doesn’t perpetuate misogyny, but instead effectively criticizes these things or just humor about innocuous things.


6
Recently, several top players have revealed themselves to be transphobic, much to the dismay of many in the community, including prominent members like Bobby Scar, who posted an extensive Twitter thread condemning transphobes in the Melee community. As they make up the majority of the community, do cis male members (especially leaders, a la Scar) in the community have a heightened responsibility to speak out against transphobia and sexism within the community? Why or why not?

I think people with platforms have an obligation to recognize their platform and use it for good. I can’t get everyone to agree with me, but i do think prioritizing the well being of minoritied people is unequivocally good and community building. I won’t hyper pressure people into what to do with their platform, but mayeb I should, at least in certain situations. I do try to focus on expressing approval and trusting those that do and doing the opposite with those that dont. However, many of them I think would do better listyening to transpeople first and uplifting thier voices instead of trying to speak for them. Just my two cents, I think it applies to everything. We need to utilize the power to express our truths, while also uplifting others that speak their truth best.


7
We recently saw a case in which a top player came out and apologized for past instances of transphobic comments, which received a mixed reception from the community, including a variety of harsh criticism, careful optimism, and even complete denial of any fault to begin with. Do you have a take on this? Should the community be receptive towards past offenders or did they blow their chance? Does it depend on the severity?

I think its important to recognize your mistakes and also how to improve. I implore individuals that fuck up to recognize how todo better, accept where you cant fix the past, but also practice improvement. I think the community should be skeptical, and I do think it depends on the severity of the crime. This is anecdotal, but I know someone though that was ostracized for past transphobic remarks, and apparently made public apologies and talked to a friend (who is trans) to give an indepth apology. I also was made aware that he publically another tgirl to try to like redeem himself? And that girl was really uncomfortable bc he made their relationship seem more close and friendly than it really was, and it was clear it was for public gain. Anyways, Im jsut hearing this so im not sure how true itis, but my idea is, is that i am skeptical of people that fuck up over and over again, and then barely apologize, and also misuse people for personal gain. I prioritize victim and community comfort/safety. I still encourage growth and introspection, I think criticism is important and I also think so is facilitating rehabilitation and growth. I dont think that these things should be mutually exclusive.

8
It seems like whenever there is a trans player or commentator on stream at a major event or in personal streams, the chat becomes a hotbed for disgusting comments targeted towards them. Do you think the chat is representative of the community at large, or just an insignificant subsect of transphobic trolls? If you’ve experienced this before, how do you handle/respond to it?

before anyone says that twitch chat isn’t a legitimate part of the community, yes it is . there’s so many ppl in twitch chat ,and whether or not they go to tournaments doesn’t matter (and many do) but they contribute to the community, and the ppl leave an impact. it’s disgusting that trans women can’t play on stream without an influx of transphobic comments. I think instead of dismissing these as trolls and insignificant, they should be addressed. it shoudnt take much energy to automatically ban or block in chat, and also address an intolerance of transphobia. It scares me that a lot of ppl exert energy into dismissing ppl that bring attention to transphobia instead of just dismissing transphobes and supporting trans ppl.

Im lucky that i havent faced much transphobia personally, im not out to most ppl in my local scene. Ive really only talked to one person in my local in depth about nonbinaryness, but it was more so me listening and supporting my friend in their relationship w gender, i didnt really go into depth in coming out to them. I just wanted to listen and offer them support.

Tw dysphoria
I do face dysphoria at tournaments a lot, and i am read as a woman very often. I align with certain aspects of femininity, but being read aligned with different aspects is dysphoric for me. I get dysphoria when ppl hyper feminize me, and also read me very hetero. But i am scared to come out or go in depth w most of my friends, or correct them. I kinda subtly push for androgyny and masculinity, but i do dress very feminine. Its really all i know to be honest, its all i have and a new wardrobe is expensive and a struggle to learn. Im slowly learning though, but sometimes i enjoy femininity. Gender fluidity. I remember one time i went to a tournament dressed masc. I hid my face w a cap and hid my hair. Ppl didnt recognize me at first and i was coded male. I remember how wonderful that felt. Ive been kinda emotional lately but writing this is making me tear up lol happy memories.

Tw rape and dysphoria and sex/tmi
After my first rape, i struggled a lot w my genitals. I hated hated hated my vagina. I lost my sexuality and the only way i regained it was fantasizing about having a dick and fucking pussy LOOOOOL it was very new and strange for me. I couldnt have sex being present in my body or really acknowledging it. I engaged in a lot of hetero, absent-attraction sex that i felt i kinda pressured myself into to regain control of my body. I think this made things worse. When i finally got to fuck my ex girlfriend w a strap on, i remember how great it felt despite zero stimulation. Im a lot more comfortable w my genitalia now and have processed that first rape a lot better, but i still wish i had a penis. Cis dudes are so lucky LOL i wanna fuck a hot cis girl w a tight pussy and nut inside her wtfffffff im so jealous LOLLLLL but ofc im not only attracvted to cis women just wanna make that clear, but thats def an experience i wish i could have lmaio











9
If you were watching a Melee stream for the first time and were interested in learning more about the community, would seeing a chat like that change your mind? Additionally, The Smash Brothers documentary continues to be an entry point for many modern Melee players, but it has been criticized for repeated use of slurs and insensitive language in its interviews, as well as the comically brief segment highlighting such terminology. With both of these major entry points being rather problematic, what would you say or recommend to prospective (especially queer/trans) players interested, but concerned about the community’s inclusion?

I would likely change my mind, but my love for melee kept me in it. If I didn’t have an initial passion, I dont imagine i would grow it easily if seeing the community for the first time. I tried to get into league, but learning it and dealing w primarily toxic ppl in the game made me cry and stop playing LOOOOL i cant handle bullying but i love to learn things and make friends…
I think community can often bring healing. Finding queer trans community saved me. And i know for others it did too, and its important to have good support systems. I dont think its fair to expect staying in the community, I think its important to encourage what people find useful/healing for themselves.
I wish for more queer/trans ppl to have stronger platformsl, with community growth and healing and support in their priorities and praxis.
I wish for more people with large platforms to have their heart in the right places, to listen and support us. I wish this on a larger scale but im keeping my rambles to melee for now LOL

10 Do you think Melee’s homogenity holds it back from being enjoyed by more people and generally being more akin to the popularity of Ultimate and other bigger eSports games? Will the community’s inability to evolve enough be a factor in its eventual demise?

I mean, I think so, but i do think its changing, i am biased because of the groups im in and as im seeing more ppl w platforms speak out and attempting. So i think its going to be better but will take time, and probably a back and forth process as most growth is. I am worried about todays general poltiical climate, especially in america, in terms of who has power and what kind of thinking is being passed down. But i believe in change, Ive had friends who taught me ways that liberated myself and also brought focus on the liberation of others. For that im thankful, and I dont think thats impossible for others. I want to do my best and I wish for others to do the same. I wish for us to grow and learn in a way that is beneficial and especially uplifts the disenfranchised. I wish for meaningful, enlightening, healing, growth in power, in all our communities.
I think yeah if the community doesnt improve itll hurt it, but i dont think itll beits demise. I think the demise is the possibility of new players getting into it being lower than if the game is reintroduced on a widescale. Theres still new players coming in who never played the game in childhood, but many players had this game in childhood. If they stop out of boredom or other obligations, then yeah itll die out. Also this game is so grassroots and nintendos interference is disrupting the melee communities ability to thrive,. There is little to no financial support and strict guidelines. Nintendo is not profitting from this game anymore and is very anti pirating, but also does not manufacture copies of melee anymore so its like… harder and harder. But we love and we have passion, we are honestly, to a degree, addicted.
I LOVE MELEE!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for reading

Also, i didnt really talk about racism much but i think its very prevalent in the community, but I dont think im confident in my voice in it, and there are many others who experience it more directly in its diff ways, and i advise ppl to seek those voices and support them when they come across our daily lives. Dat is all!!!

If you read all of this thank you so much. i hope to say hi in tournaments and bless you . i hope you picked something up from this. this is 12 pages of a ducking smash diary lol ANYWAYS add me on disc if u want gumgod420#6181





Reply · Report Post