Michael Adams · @MikeyA
23rd Jun 2020 from TwitLonger
Recent events involving Helena
Helena recently decided to post her story about a series of emotionally abusive interactions with an individual and the following harassment that resulted from the involved individuals' actions.
She did this without naming him or anyone else to avoid harm to other parties, as her goal was to change the way she was perceived in the community. Her reputation had been sullied by rumours spread about her as a result of said individual' actions, and as a result this restricted her ability to participate in the community. These rumours cost her friends and subjected her to harsh trolling which made her feel the need to leave the community entirely.
The individual addressed her story by firstly mentioning how important the movement of women coming forward and telling their stories of physical and emotional abuse was to them, stating that it meant "everything" to them. They then go on to fully deny any accountability for anything they did, and manipulate her story to imply it was inappropriate of her to come out and tell it, by claiming that Helena "mentioned women without their consent" (no one was explicitly named or talked about in a way that implicated them negatively) as well as to claim the same people who propagated their rumours "stand" by Helena, which is simply not true and aims to shift blame to Helena.
Firstly, it's absolutely disgusting to claim you support women and their voice in these matters, when you subsequently manipulate their story to make it seem like they're wrong for even bringing it up, as if it's harmful to you and others. YOU did this to yourself with your own actions and the consequences of people knowing that (as the story deserves to be shared) are your fault, not the victim's.
It's abhorrent to hide behind the pretence of supporting the "#MeToo" movement whilst simultaneously not taking responsibility for anything you did, or even simply apologising. You do way more harm to this movement you claim to care so much about by not owning the mistakes you've made and your misbehaviour, which shows that you haven't matured and that you care more about yourself than making things right for the hurt that you've caused.
I hope you can reconsider what you think your role is in this story to prevent further harm and resolve at least some of the pain you've created.
It was so hard for Helena to talk about this publicly and it's something she's had to live with for years, and undermining her story with your weak response not only hurts her but makes it harder for other women who've had to live with similar experiences to feel like they can speak up as well.