Matt Demers · @MattDemers

31st Oct 2019 from TwitLonger

Today's my last day at Evil Geniuses.

I've decided to leave Evil Geniuses, and today is my last day — while it's a bit somber, the decision was made amicably, and with everyone's best interests in mind.

If you've followed my esports journey, you'll know that I've struggled with mental health issues for a large part of my adult life, and I've tried various ways to work with my depression and anxiety. EG has been incredibly supportive of my needs, but recently I've been finding that my priorities and overall health have shifted in a way that needs more direct attention and intervention.

Working in the esports industry requires an incredible amount of passion, energy and dedication in order to bring the best possible experience to support fans, sponsors, and players. At the end of the day, the way I was coping with stress and taking care of myself was not healthy, and I need to improve in order to be able to handle similar situations in the future.

I'd like to thank Evil Geniuses for the massive amount of patience and trust that it takes to let someone run their online presence, and enabling my vision for what an esports team could be. Thanks to Phillip Aram (@Phillip_Aram) and PPD (@Peterpandam) for giving me a chance in the first place, and Nicole LaPointe Jameson (@totheLapointe) for captaining the EG ship into tomorrow.

I'd like to specifically thank Kevin (@KevinAvegard) and Jess (@JoyAndJoyness) for being an amazing team to work with — you don't find that kind of synergy with people often, and they're extremely talented. They have helped me grow as a creative and professional, and I'm extremely grateful for that. The EG staff are passionate people, and I’m extremely proud of what we’ve accomplished together.

I'd like to thank every player from the team who let me into their lives, as I know that the chaos of esports means a lot of random faces pop in and out. I've always emphasized respecting your time and working to build your trust — I think these values are important for any organization.

Lastly, I want to thank the fans who enabled us to do our jobs; without you, esports isn't possible. Interacting with fans on Twitter, Discord, or in person at events honestly was a highlight for me, mostly because of the shared connection — it gave me energy, and in turn I wanted to make cheering for our team just that much better. Thank you for sharing in our highs and lows with patience and enthusiasm.

So yeah. Tomorrow will be through the looking glass; I'm scared, but excited to learn what kind of person I am outside of esports, and when I’m not putting career success above everything else.

While it’s easy to say the same old “I’ll be streaming and doing my own content more”, I’ve realized that these pursuits were enabling me to avoid doing difficult, personal work that will make me a better, more resilient person. I'm likely going to be scaling back my online presence for the time being, and focusing more on what I can improve in my offline life.

Thanks for everything. Be kind to yourselves. I’ll be around.

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