Cheick's new Schmooveᴮᴸᴹ · @What_the_Cheick
12th Aug 2019 from TwitLonger
My mind right now is like 3 different emotions and voices twisted and contorting and interrupting and overlapping each other, all distorted. I have a headache and it feels like I'm about to crack open. I want to talk to someone about it
But
My mind only wants someone like them to talk about it
I don't know if I want to still be with them
I just want someone to care
I just want someone to be close
And it feels like I'm insulting all my other friends
Being so distraught over people who don't return my messages even 6 months later
My mind feels like it's eroding away
I just want to make people happy
But I'm never happy myself
I just want to feel like someone cares enough outside of just asking me if I'm okay
I miss people coming to me when they felt down
I miss just being able to chill and play games or watch stuff
Every day I'm just dragged through these feelings and it's just worse and worse and I tried to do something about it and nothing happened, because what was I suppose to expect, that things would just get better?
Nothing that I've ever known has gotten better
Everything just gets worse
And worse
And worse and worse and worse and worse and then I need a distraction and then it comes and then the feelings come back worse to the point where the distraction can't do anything and I just want to be hugged
I just want to be told it'll be alright
I just want to be able to cry my eyes out in someone's arm I just want someone to help me
I just want someone to care