Process until now and what i will do

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Doubts about the past

Let's move back to the moment of TI6. After the tournament ended, I wrote one tweet titled "My journey gonna be done with team MVP" which meant my contract would be expired soon.
At that time I couldn't be sure whether what I wrote was correct or not since I couldn't speak any English when I wrote that tweet.

Oh, I should like to mention my ability in English for a while in passing. My English skills are not perfect so I try to improve myself in English even right now. But only 3 years ago I had very little knowledge of English and couldn't speak any. I've never learned English properly in my entire life so some very basic words just like “Hi, how are you? nice to meet you” were all the English that I knew. The first time I ever used English was when DeMoN joined MVP Phoenix in December 2013, and besides only five words like ‘hi’, ‘bye’, ‘go’, ‘back’ and ‘YOLO’ were all means of communication, well, sometimes ‘fuckin’ were added LOL. After MVP Phoenix won NSL Season 2, DeMoN left the team and I thought that there would be no chance to use English ever. (....) Right, I was totally wrong.
After DAC 2015 China tournament, MVP splitted up their Phoenix squad so I moved to HOT6ix with Heen and a few days later JerAx joined MVP HOT6ix.Heen sunbhie and mp were used to live at abroad, so they could use english like native english speaker
While SunBhie, MP and Heen were having a conversation in English, I remained silent. Truth be told, I was separated from the others because I couldn't quite understand what was going on. In the same circumstances, 5 months has passed, and the team got last place in TI5.

In August 2016, I received a lot of offers from a lot of teams. I was really happy because it meant that I was recognized as one of the best players by ppl widely! Whereas, I also worried about using English. As mentioned before I’ve never learned English properly in my entire life, so now that I think about it, my English was almost terrible LOL. For the first time in my life, and eventually, I felt that I needed to improve my English seriously. Then I started learning and studying English at least googling English grammar and vocabulary.






Team Secret

My first team abroad was Team Secret. I was really honored to play with them. I felt like I became a super star but soon, one big problem brought me to reality. Yeah, that was English! I couldn’t communicate with the other players well. I have received help from MP to understand what that communication was about and to learn how to speak in a certain situation. I'm thankful MP was there, with me.

However, it wasn’t enough. Whenever one player made some calls, I used to say in reply like “yeah, okay, got it, got it” but in most cases, I shouldn't have said like that. Like this, similar situation as above was repeated and repeated again, it caused a lot of mis-communications including game skills which needed to be combined works of team players. Naturally I should played on my instinct only, without accurate communications. For that reason, I felt too much guilty because team’s ingame communications were inactive by me.

Two weeks before the Boston Major qualifier, I talked to Puppey that I wanted to quit the team but the rest of players convinced me to just play the major qualifier, which took only 2 weeks. Well, after lost the Boston Major qualifier, I ran away like a coward.


Back to the home

After that, MVP Phoenix requested me to play the Boston Major as standin and I accepted that request, and the important reason why I accept that request is because I could speak Korean and there would be no problem with communication. I admit, I wouldn’t accept if any English team request me(Team Execration requested me for the Boston Major too) because at that time I had a trauma of using English.
By the way, after the Boston major ended, we realized that we had 2 offlaners in a team, so unless I changed my position to a carry role, this team won't be work properly.
The role that I really preferred was an offlaner since I’ve played in competitive scene as an offlaner, about 90% of my entire career. Therefore, I had no where to stand in Korea, because MVP was the only one team which supported Korean Dota 2 back then.



Team B)ears

This team was the first fully English team to me. Even though I studied English hard in the past few months, I had rougher time than when I was on Team Secret. I should figure everything out by myself using English because there was no one who could translate English to Korean for me.

We tried to set up a bootcamp twice, the first one was in Berlin and the second one was in Poland. Of course, Adam and I spent our money on booking hotel, flights and buying foods by ourselves because we had no sponsors.
I talked to FATA about what I worried, those were ’my poor English’ and our budget crisis right now. Keep doing this project was too much risk for me since I already spent 800~900 USD for 2 bootcamps.



Team Digital Chaos

After the Kiev Major concluded, I got offered from DC and it was really good news for me because Dubu was in DC too. My English was developing from day to day but when speaking English, I often made mistakes and sometimes it led to mis-communications, still.
We made to go TI7. I met all Korean players at the venue, felt so happy.



Team Immortal

At the after party of TI7, it became so clear that all of Korean player wanted to play together again. I preferred this option as first priority. Still English was hard for me(it’s been 1 year), meanwhile, using Korean, reaction rate was so faster.
I am not good at multitasking; Playing Dota and Translating at the same time.

For the 3 months we played okay, but after new patch happened,rough times were started.Each players has different ideas that way of play dota and how we approached at new patch.
Especially QO and I had lots of conflicts which systemizing about how we play on the map and taking objective. We couldn't find an answer.
At the end, both of us left the Team IMT.



Team Echo International

To me, it was the second fully English team. The first squad was with SVG. We set up a bootcamp at Koln. We couldn’t get any sponsors, so only the two of us, ana and I needed to spend our own money. After a few days, ChuaN offered us to come China so we got Echo Organization.

In our first month, we tried very hard but failed to qualify. Later, Keyser and Saksa went back to Europe and ana and I still tried with 3 Chinese players.
Among those 3 Chinese players, only Dstones had the ability to speak English so smooth communication would be hard to expect. In fact, any communication was impossible.

In May 2018, ana and I moved to my home in Seoul.



Team Wind and Rain
This team was basically Ti qualifier trying out team.
I came to have confidence in using English through playing with ana. ana and I decided to play TI qualifier with NA stacks(Ritsu, Bryle, Kitrak).
They were really friendly to us and I wasn’t afraid to use English anymore.
While we were practicing, some roster change between EG and OG happened. ana received an offer from OG and he moved on it, and at the end MiLAN joined us just two weeks before qualifier.

I can say without any hesitation that we really played well during TI qualifier!
However OG beat us in the Grand Final(3-1) and they finally won TI8.
Good job with ana and JerAx, Two Thumbs Up!



Team J.Storm

After leaving the military, March returned to the professional Dota 2 scene as a coach for Echo International and later Team Wind and Rain. Especially as a coach for Team Wind and Rain, he led us to the Grand Final of TI qualifier. We couldn’t go to the Grand Final if we had no March.

Every players trusted March as their captain and a leader. I already knew his ability to captain well because I’ve played with him before, and I’ve seen his successful performance and ranked top 8 at TI5.

We got 2nd place at WSOE #1 in October 2018, and got 1st place at WSOE 6 in April 2019. Moreover, we participated in 3 Major events(12th, 12th, 8th).

As I wrote the latest tweet, the last 2 years with J.Storm will always remind me of happier days than when I’ve ever played on any other team.



PS. About MiLAN

Recently we talked for hours and it was all good.

I felt bad when I first heard that he got kicked and moreover, his writing on his blog seemed like the direct reason he got kicked was just because of me.

In fact, at that time, everyone got sick since we came to Kuala Lumpur from New York and we spent such a long time(almost 24 hours) on airplane (Someone caught a cold, jetlagged..)

We arrived at our bootcamp in Kuala Lumpur two weeks before moving to the hotel, that is a accommodation for players who participated in the major event and also the place where all matches of Group stage were held. I thought we had enough time to handle our conditions.

“Thing” happened when we had 1~2 days left to play the match. I didn’t mean to say like “Can you not be sick!?”, which sounds too aggressive, thoughtless and sometimes that sentence seems like attacking him.

What I really tried to say was “We are supposed to make best condition on match days because we are pro player, so you’d better take control of your health”

But like he said on his blog, we had bad scrim results before we play the match. I was a little edgy in the competition. If my mind was more at ease, I could say it better way.

I assumed he was offended so much by my words. Apologize it again and again.

The reason why I team-ed up with him is because the way of his playing is really good and it fits my play style and I enjoyed a WindandRain time with him. I would like to say that he is one of my best partners. I’m willing to play with him in the future if we have a chance.



Present

Just parted with J.storm and I’m standing alone.


Future

When I was interviewed with J.Storm, I did say “I will play under J.Storm organization until I retired unless I get kicked” but that happened LOL.
I will organize my future plan of Dota 2. At my next dota 2 team ,no matter what I’ll sign there for more than 2 years(unless i get kicked, I will sit there)
I want to actively participate in the long-run project as what I did with team MVP before. Hope you guys root for me and wish me good luck <3


Conclusion

I want you guys don't misunderstand what I did and I’m sorry to avoid and not to answer which you wondered for a long time.

I was afraid of delivering messages wrong as not my purpose. Now I’m encouraged to express anything what I want to say(it’s been 3 years since I started to use English properly).
So that I wrote what I've done in the past and how I've been

Thank you for reading this long tweet.

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