Blizzcon and next year
Based on some rumors that is going around right now, I would like to clear up some misunderstandings: I warn you, this will be a long message since I will start with telling you the path of my career on Heroes of the Storm.
Where to start? I have always been a player of a certain level but have never aspired myself to become a professional because I found it quite unattainable, I always enjoyed watching the games from home (DotA, CS, LoL). When I saw all these people playing on stage, travelling, being part of the best players in the world in their respective game range I thought WOW, it must be great living that kind of life, the sprinkles in their eyes.
When I was younger, I had health issues that influenced my schooling and lost an amount of precious years of education. I felt like a loser for my parents, that I could not give them a clear path of my future not even mentioning the feeling that I have failed my life. However, I ended up studying Music and English in Middle School during that time I quickly realized that school was not meant for me and that I needed to do something bigger much more challenging. Friends of mine tried to convince me to get myself into competition gaming because they saw the talent and the opportunity in me and that it would be a waste for not doing so. Left my job as well as my studies overnight to try taking up that new challenge which is, Heroes of the Storm. I did not want to have any regret so I allowed myself to take a year to see what I was capable of. Motivated I have started to climb the ladder joined a small team and participated in my very first tournaments. It only took me a few months until I got recognized by Natus Vincere. Na'vi guys!
I was a big fan of Navi on Dota and I could not believe what was happening. Being part of their team? I mean, can you imagine how I must have felt? Being part of the team that I respected more than anything. I immediately accepted the opportunity and was dynamite. I could feel the motivation going way ahead of myself. The ambition of taking this opportunity and deliver. A new chapter in life where failing was not an option, working hard to keep my place and trying my best to grow in this industry. I started to chain tournaments left to right, take the train, the plane, like all the people I was looking up to, it was crazy, I was like a little kid. Arriving at the European Championship for Blizzcon we were part of the qualifications… Prague... A huge scene with an audience of madness, crazy pressures, WE WON THE CHAMPIONSHIP without conceding a single map, this is something that will remain in my memories forever all the emotions made me feel like I have finally accomplished something and my parents could finally be proud of me.
Time passed, pressure was settled, and the hype was set.
The experiences I had on Heroes of the Storm made me the person that I am today, I learned a lot, both online and on humanity. When I joined Dignitas, I became Drafter and Shoutcaller for the team. Unfortunately, I have to say that this mission was very difficult and at times quite exhausting. Being in this role brings up many responsibilities, when you lose for example you have to reconsider all your drafts and calls even when the problems does not come from there. I was forced to think like that and I have told myself that I had not done enough and that I could have done better being a drafter and Shoutcaller. Learning to absorb the critics on a positive way and being constructive. Try to create a good working atmosphere and not tilt. I did everything I could and got hooked. Succeeded on some points, and failed in others. Little by little, I have reached a dark end where there was no way out fact that the team was not advancing as I would have hoped and as I had envisaged. I thought several times to stop everything right there because I had the impression I have done much but for little results. Without further details, I went from range to melee and from melee to tank being single player to a Drafter Shoutcaller in less than a year, which was overwhelming and took over a big part of me. I could not have given myself the change to enjoy what I was doing anymore because the only thing I was focused on was winning. Because sure thing, winning a tournament and being on stage with a trophy in your hands is an inexplicable feeling of happiness that comes alive. All the difficulties you faced evaporates in a blink of an eye with a reward of the hard work delivered. Unfortunately, moments of fame are not eternal so returning back home means back to the daily life no time to look back only train to perform. How does the life of professional gaming looks to you? Still as cool? Of course! Although it does not sounds very enchanting, to me I have not told you the good things yet that happened to me during this path. I was able to meet people that shared the same dreams, having the same goals, same passions. Sharing this experience with all people around the world in an incredible experience to be cherished for life and I am so grateful for that.
I would also like to clarify the speculation that this decision might be due to financial aspects and I express: “Never in my life have I ever or dare to imagine the comfort I’m receiving today which I’m grateful of"
However, let’s focus on the current living moment. Although I was relieved having Wubby on the Shoutcall and Draft after Blizzcon 2017 I still had the feeling the damage has been done and that I will not manage to retain the same motivation I had when I first started. It will not prevent the fact that I will be quitting pushing myself performing my best case to close this year beautifully.
I therefore assure you that my announcement of departure will not change our synergy and our performance that I can guarantee. It's the last chance for me to win a Blizzcon contest you though I was going to give that up so easily?! My ambition for next year is to compete solo games and become a regular streamer. Being a teamplayer has been a great experience but it is time for me to set free.
I would like to express my sincere thankfulness to all the people I have collaborated with so far, all the teams that gave me the chance to represent them; Madcorps, Natus Vincere, Dignitas, all the people who are part of them and all the people who have been able to give us these wonderful scenes (stages) for the various championships. Blizzard for their excellent game and the support that I consider amazingly set towards the players. Moreover, you, the fans, the spectators who without you, us players would not exist and would not be living these dreams.
ps : There is a possibility that you will find me playing Heroes Of The Storms again but purely for fun and with different objectives