An honest update regarding my health situation and what's going on.
I’ve had a really rough night here in Sydney and following the announcement of me not being at our signing session in Sydney I wanted to share how my situation is currently.
As a lot of you might know I was unable to play during the last months of 2017. The reason to this was that my stomach starting acting up. It all began after the EL Major we won, where I started having acid reflux problems. Back then it didn’t really matter that much to me, I could still basically do anything I’d like regarding food, drinks workout etc.
Fast forward to end of 2017 it started acting up weirdly right before IEM Oakland but I ended up going to the event anyways, and after we lost in the group stages that evening I was hospitalized there. It wasn’t acute enough for them to start doing all the tests that I therefore had to do in Denmark.
When I came back to Denmark and starting doing my tests things were looking quite alright. I for sure didn’t have anything life threatening or anything that needed surgery. That was the last thing they told me at the hospital. But I was still feeling bad, nausea and stomach burns 90% throughout the day and not getting better.
So with the help of RFRSH and our sports director I got hold of a different doctor that I would see and start having counseling with a dietitian also. The conclusion of these meetings were that I had stress-caused IBS, acid reflux - in general a really over sensitive stomach. Something that would change my lifestyle/way of living. After that I haven’t been able to put that many things into my body, it’s a constant struggle trying to figure out what triggers and being under immense stress and pressure with traveling and performance has surely taken a toll on me these past months. Even though in periods things are looking bright I get reminded every day that I haven’t found a balance of things yet. I still live in pain, being uncomfortable and feeling nausea/sick/vomiting is probably never going to go away while I am doing this.
I guess I wanted to share this because in some way I feel guilty towards my teammates that have been working their asses of doing the content and pulling my weight these few months. The trust I’m getting from them is the main reason why I haven’t given up and why I’ll never do so.
This really became a longer message than I expected and I want to close it out by thanking all of the people that I’ve had close to me the last few months constantly pushing me towards a more positive daily life and helping me grow into the wiser version of myself that I am today.
So special thanks to you Lukas, Peter, Andreas, Emil, Danny & especially you Emilia for being there every single day. I love you guys.
I have so many good people around me, and things are certainly going in the right direction. I still have to learn how to take better care of myself, but step by step I’ll get there. Thanks again for your understanding and support.