I fucked up and deserve to be dropped from Toronto Esports, I won't try to argue or make an excuse, I don't have any. I just want people to know what happened. I was having a really bad day. Didn't get much sleep, twitch wouldn't work for 2 hours after I woke up, and once it finally did, my internet was lagging. So I was pretty upset from the moment I woke up.
Then I get into a game against a widowmaker who is blatantly cheating. Everything was whatever, I've dealt with cheaters before, but when him and his entire team, and MY entire team start talking shit, it gets to me. I snapped. This isn't the first time this has happened. I have anger problems.
The only thing I can say is that despite me using that word, I am not a racist. I was extremely upset, and I was trying to make the person I was angry with upset as well, and so I said the most offensive thing that came to mind.
I fucked up, I have no excuse. Toronto Esports is a great organization and I am sorry to them for tarnishing their name. I've put my entire life into gaming/esports and this has been a massive wake up call.