イリ · @Ilinox

19th Sep 2016 from TwitLonger

so spoilers. much warning. wow. @echostruck #mmspoilers blah blah blah just filling in the text so the twitlonger portion will hide everything.

OKAY. totally gonna steal your format suri and basically just bounce off of your point (hello i hope none of you have ever had the impression that i was eloquent because i clearly can't format anything and just like to reply to ppl's points--).

????? i'm still haunted by the concept blurbs for him and rika and this stress on him "[achieving] philosophical love" wtf does that even mean?? like love in its purest epistemological form?? his love is so pure that he accepts the other so completely no matter what they do and to the point of martyring or destroying himself?? because that don't sound like pure love to me LOL and he made me take 15915 steps back thinking "buddy you have ISSUES".

(i'm actually laughing so hard at how jumin, v, and rika all have like the same issues re: idolizing, idealizing, putting people on pedestals, and possessive ownership, except out of all of them jumin is the only one that handles it well. THAT'S MY BOY. SLAYYYY, ahem, okay continuing on...)

anyway yeah he rang so many alarm bells and like being attracted to rika because of her "innocence"?? like he offsetted it by saying he loved everything about her including her dark and twisted thoughts BUT IT WAS JUST VERGING SO MUCH INTO CRAZY ARTISTIC OBSESSION TO ME and i actually clapped when rika called him out on it like "i feel like you think my pain is beautiful...!" but then v replied with "you're not wrong. i love everything about you, even the pain" which YEAH WTF? BRO. i get it. i get it that you love her so much and all facets of her and everything but... buddy you're scaring me.

(it brings me back to jumin actually getting angry in a call with you about v and talking about how "... the most important words are those you "must" say like necessary advice. if you ignore that because you're afraid to ruin the friendship, that is not a true friend. and a true friend should also stop one another from making the wrong choices" like yeah he was talking about friends here but i think this applies to your lover too because your lover is like your best friend, no?)

anyway wow i didn't mean for this to sound like i hate v LMAO because he did try!! he tried his best to help her and reassure her that he'd be there and was basically the punching back when she really went off the deep end. the whole thing was so tragic because like i can't blame rika that much?? (more on her later otherwise this section will be TOO MUCH but ili it's already too much-- shHHHH) and it just reminded me of those stories you read about loving someone with a terminal illness maybe? alzheimers? dementia? cancer? like there's a ticking time bomb and they're slowly losing pieces of themselves but what can you do because they are your other half, your soul mate, the one you met in heaven and are reborn to love, etc etc.

he gets all the points for sticking with her and preparing to martyr himself. and he's just a sympathetic and tragic guy who got caught up in his love and as it downward spiralled couldn't think of a way to help, felt guilty like maybe he was a part of it, and so wanted to atone for the things he did?? i can respect that and he tried his best to protect the RFA, so b'aww point for you there too mister.

(but you're still creepy with the whole metaphors and talk about how she's like a white canvas and the colors on her are so vibrant and with depth and like yeah holy hell can you sound more like a psychopathic serial killer??)

AHAHAHAHA okay now that i got that out of my system let's do this. i was so emotional when finding out things about her and probably sounded like i wanted to murder her a thousand times over but!! that's just because i was on the RFA and seven's side and so not being objective at all and pretty much hissing "DON'T TOUCH THEM" at all points.

but taking a step back to be objective. i can't bring myself to hate her or blame her, kinda?? COMPLICATED FEELINGS. mental issues are tricky to handle and i actually think MM did pretty well with that. there's no magical cure (for saeran too) and she clearly spiraled into abuse and stuff but like... damn, you have to admit she was pretty great of a person when she still had a grip on herself.

because she formed the RFA and if you feel anything for them then you have to acknowledge that it was rika who ultimately brought them all together like that. she's ESSENTIAL to them and in the free talk with the VAs they make a mention of how rika was kinda like the "turning point" for a lot of the characters. so anyway yeah it's like, wow, i can see the purity and goodness that she strove towards...

but then she self-destructs with her mental issues which is sad. but while i feel sympathetic to that i'm also like "YEAH WELL SUCK IT UP GURL. WE'RE ALL DEALING WITH OUR OWN ISSUES" and hell yoosung goes through the same existential crisis of not knowing his purpose in life but he doesn't flip out and make a religious cult to brainwash people lmao (... then again i haven't done his route so maybe he will reveal more issues?? apart from his yandereness and seeing you as rika??).

mental issues does not justify anything or absolve you from acting like a gross person and abusing others. you just gotta learn to live with them and work around them (sucks but hey life is hard but we can make it better on ourselves with supportive friends and bond, etc etc. gotta keep positive here).

it's funny but in the va free talk they kinda bashed rika because none of them like the "innocent idealist" character (tho like i said they acknowledge she was a turning point for everyone) and THIS IS ME!! ultimately while i'm like "yeah i feel sad about your story" i'm rolling my eyes at how she was SO INTENT on goodness that it leads her to committing everything that happens in the game just because she was scared about herself and the darkness in her. she tried to hied it and push it away so much that it ultimately consumed her. seriously i feel like if she opened up more, not just to v who had some issues with how accepting he was, and not just her therapist either (cause it clearly wasn't working??), and had more support systems in place with yoosung and jumin then maybe?? things could have been better??

and i almost felt like she lashed out into the extreme "dark side hidden under the cover of being good" (with her brainwashing cult) because she wanted to test v's love ultimately. like "oh you say you don't mind all the sides of me? WELL HOW ABOUT THIS" and she's just deluding herself into thinking that she wants to one-up him and show him that she's right and he's wrong and she can exist w/o him because DEEP DOWN she's paranoid and scared of him leaving and the more terrible and horrific things she does and the more v continues to stay with her just enables her... yeah... lmao vanderwood was right. the entire thing was basically a goddamn couple's fight spurred on by her insecurities.

(a side note but this is why i feel so uneasy around ppl who are super nice and super /good/. like where is your dark side. i can't trust you until i see you pushed to a limit or reveal an ugly side of yourself, oops).

★ jumin v. seven: SURI THAT IS EXACTLY HOW I FEEL LOL. Jumin is my personal bias because I ain't touching the drama llama in seven's life with a ten foot pole. like i love love love the whole bond between the twins but i struggle with Jumin Issues™ for possessiveness and owning others so i'm not strong enough for the 2-for-1 package deal LOL (mainly that i don't actually like saeran?? so any feelings i have towards him is just tolerance because of seven, oops)

(oops continued: THE SUPER TOUCHING EMOTIONAL SCENE when seven is like "you are me, i am you" and about thanking saeran for existing to giving him someone to protect, etc" i was like "... so what about MC?" like obvs you can love more than one person and there's romantic bonds and familial bonds and platonic bonds etc. etc. and seven does tell you he's managing to survive saeran's hurtful words because your love is supporting him BUT I'M SO PETTY FORGIVE ME SEVEN). also i mentioned on twitter i had a flashback to the ot3 end in gekka and i was wincing ;;; i mean in saeran's perspective, there's this twin bond shared and yet you're so broken and got the shitty end and your twin is there attaining happiness. like holy shit the bitterness that can sprout there?? then again he's more depressed and doesn't see the point in life so maybe we avoided the whole knife stab thingy.

but SEVEN/MC IS SO HARD CANON. THE FATES HAVE LITERALLY PREDETERMINED IT SO. like holy shit all the going to the moon and space station references you can joke around with seven about and how it appears in the song. AND THEN OP SONG DROP IN HIS ROUTE? LIKE IF THAT'S NOT FATE THEN I'M GOING TO EAT MY SHOE (i gotta check this in korean so suri you can confirm whether the choice = lyrics of the song and the translators just accidentally translated it differently than the eng song lyrics).

agree so much on how chilling it is to think about none of this coming to light if you do another's route too. like ??? does mint eye just self-destruct? because V disappears half the time in other routes right (at least jumin and zen's) so i wonder if he sacrificed himself and died to rika and that cured her craziness?? but saeran is still out there and lost?? unless he commits suicide cause his savior is gone and there's nothing left for him AND THIS ENTIRE THING SEVEN IS JUST IGNORANT TO... which... you know isn't so bad now that i think about it. ignorance is bliss and all that, yeah. (i mean hella tragic but not as tragic as him being BROKEN... though twin bond and premonition feelings and all that ahhhhhh. also this might just be me trying to make myself feel better so i can even BEAR to think about checking the last two routes i have to do still).

-- it just occurred to me that if you do seven's route before anyone else's and you have to go back to do their route you're placed in the exact position that V is in holy shit. where you know all these secrets but you can't say anything (to protect the rest of the RFA?? ignorance is bliss??) except in your situation it's more like "i have no mouth but i must scream" because you're helplessly limited by the choices given to you lol.

-- looking at any of seven's messages now just fills me with so much sadness?? like it's said that he's a positive person generally and the very end of the secret endings shows how he kind of bounces back and regains his humor but considering the latter half of his route and like everything in the secret end leading UP to the ending he's super serious and grim (justified considering the situation) makes me wonder just how much he hid behind 707 and put on a smile to block his pain. it's not that i think he was "fake" and 707 and luciel are all a part of him but mmmm it just hurts knowing that in any other routes he doesn't show you his true self (apart from the terrifying breakdown in jumin's route).

-- speaking of seven messages he has this line (can't remember whose route) about how when he's depressed he just stares up at the sky. AND THEN IN THE SECRET ENDS saeran talks about staring at the sky and SEVEN IS THE ONE WHO SAYS "i don't look at the sky much" so holy shit he took that habit from saeran (to feel connected??) and this destroys me.

-- it's so sad and disgusting that the boys got set up to be used so much. v seemed to have genuine intentions but he ends up using seven to defend the RFA etc etc and rika uses saeran to fight against seven and it's like STOP. THE TWO AREN'T POKEMON FOR YOU TO THROW AT EACH OTHER.

-- yes so much to your point, suri, about "As V's voice actor put it: not many games these days deal with themes of HEAVY love and the HURT that comes with them." I THINK THAT'S WHAT LEAVES ME SO EMOTIONAL AND LINGERINGLY EMOTIONAL TOO. all the mental issues in the game the characters struggle with so much and i can't hate v or rika or well anyone really and it's just tragic how it consumes so much around you and is a downward spiral (except the abusive mom because wth was up with that YO BITCH I HOPE YOU BURN).

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