𝒂𝒏 𝒂𝒓𝒎𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔. · @papercrowns
15th Aug 2016 from TwitLonger
( eng trans ) AGUST D - The Last
behind every idol rapper who succeeds
there's a weak self standing, it's a little dangerous
I fall sometimes again into depression and compulsion
hell no, anyway I don't even know if that's the real me
damn huh reality's separation
the conflict I've mentioned, it hurts your head
it was around 18 when my social phobia began
yeah, that's right, around that time my mental state became polluted
sometimes I'm afraid of myself, thanks to my self-hatred
and the depression that came to play again
Min Yoongi is already dead (I killed him)
it's been a long time since my everyday life became killing my passions and comparing myself with others
my parents came up the first time I went to the psychiatrist
they got counseling with me, they said they hardly knew me
I don't even know my own self, so who can know me?
friends? no, you? whoever it is, they don't know me
the doctor asked me
I said unhesitatingly that I'd been like that before
a word said like habit, oh, I don't give a shit, I don't give a fuck
those words are all words I use to hide my weak self
that time I want to erase, that's right, the memories I want to erase of that day I had that concert
I was afraid of people, so I hid in the bathroom and stared at myself
at that time I, at that time I
I thought I could compensate for success
but here's the thing, but here's the thing
as time passes by, it feels like I'm becoming a monster
my monster named success that I traded my youth for, he wants a bigger wealth
the greed that was my weapon, it devours me and sometimes it collars me
these things turn on my mouth, if I block it, he tells me to eat from the tree of knowledge
I don't want it, they want me to leave this hill
shit shit, I get it, please stop
the cause of all these issues is me, I'll quit in return
if my misfortune is your happiness then I'll be unhappy
if the target of your loathing is me then I'll go up on the guillotine
the things I only imagined are becoming reality, my childhood dream is in front of my eyes
the taste of performing in front of only two people, now Tokyo Dome is in front of my nose
living this one time life more brightly than anyone, try saying I'm living roughly
my fans, my homies, my fam, don't worry, I'm really okay now, damn
the things that corrupted my essence are numerous
my address is idol, I won't be corrupted
the agony that dug at my mental state
it's the end of wandering, there was no right answer
my self-esteem that said I'd betrayed myself is now my own pride
my fans honorably bow their heads, someone try as much as me, uh
from Seiko to Rolex, from AX Hall to the Gymnastics Stadium
the heads of many people that nod just at the movement of my hand
it's not that I couldn't do Show Me the Money, it's that I said I wouldn't, shit
it's not that you guys who betrayed us didn't do it, it's that you couldn't, shit
this world sprinkled with my creations, I've tasted sweetness and bitterness and even shit
from that time when I tried to sleep on the floor of a bathroom, now it's a memory to me, it's become a memory
the shoulder that was crushed because of an accident during my delivery job
the debut that I clutched onto, you guys just pretend like you've suffered
from Seiko to Rolex, from AX Hall to the Gymnastics Stadium
the heads of many people that nod just at the movement of my hand
it's not that I couldn't do Show Me the Money, it's that I said I wouldn't, shit
it's not that you guys who betrayed us didn't do it, it's that you couldn't, shit
TRANSLATED BY @PAPERCROWNS DO NOT REPOST