Leaving Panda Global

As of today, I am now a Free Agent. There have many things that have lead up to this, but the seeds were sewn back when we were still Team Blaze.

Leading up to Dreamhack, our team went through numerous roster changes, which were beyond our control, with bigempct leaving for Naventic, and Apauloh having real life opportunities that took priority.

In a last ditch effort, we ended up picking up Psalm and going to Panda Global to guarantee our qualification for Dreamhack, and did decently. However, it was clear we had a lot of work ahead of us.

So we qualified for Burbank, and got down to the grind. Things were looking up, but honestly the team dynamic was deteriorating. Blame was being thrown left and right and ultimately it fell upon me because I "used ancestral too late" or "didn't cleanse fast enough". And so, I slowly began to lose my voice on the team. Over the next few weeks, we began to change the way our team functioned. Shotcalling, drafting, literally everything starting from the fundamentals. We even got to the point where I missed out on one scrim block for a friend's birthday party and I came back and people had role swapped.

Then the time came around and Panda Global sent us off to our bootcamp in Las Vegas, which was great. I felt we hashed out a lot of problems we had and we went off to Burbank. When we got to Burbank though, pretty much everything went wrong. On Thursday morning I got extremely ill, and it lasted until Friday evening. Noticeably it affected my individual play. We ended up not performing very well and despite beating Tempo Storm, and lost to some great play from Astral Authority.

That evening, after we had been knocked out of the tournament. I was notified that I had been benched. Personally I was in shock. I didn't think in the slightest that I had been the reason we lost and I came to the realization that our team was no longer what it used to be.

Going back to the VODs and watching, our innovation, our strategy, our teamwork. It was a shadow of its former self. The team that was built from nothing, grinded through the amateur scene and into the pro scene over almost a year was slowly falling apart, and I could do nothing to change its course. The team I had invested so much time into, didn't believe in me anymore or what I had to say. So with a heavy heart I left, I'm not going to stay where I'm clearly not wanted.

However, with all due respect. During this whole process Panda Global as an organization has been extremely supportive and honestly I have nothing but good words for David, one of the co-owners of PG. I really appreciate everything he has done for us over the past few months as well as being around to really talk about things.

Moving forward, I'll probably take a short break from competitive to regain my bearings. But I will be back and thirsty for more.

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