SilverScarCat

P.W. · @SilverScarCat

24th Feb 2016 from TwitLonger

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Localization is not an excuse for a bad dub


So, yes, we're talking about Fire Emblem Fates here. Some people seem to think that the only reason that anyone's ticked off is because of the whole "petting mini-game" that got removed.

I'm here to explain why that's not true and why the "localization" is annoying as hell to me and many others.

If we used Nintendo Treehouse's "localization" for a classic game, say Street Fighter II, the game would look something like this.

Note: I'm only looking at the original 8 characters here.

Ryu would be named Ronald, his signature attacks would be Cheezburgur, Hot Fry Cut and Milkshake Spinner! He would be traveling the world looking for the best ingredients to make his food perfect.

Ken would still be Ken with the same moves that "Ronald" has and he comes from a very rich family of chefs.

Chun Li would be Caroline, and she has flowers to help her fight. Her Kikohou (yes, I know, that came later) would be throwing a bouquet of flowers at her opponent. Her spinning bird kick would probably be giant bees or a helicopter of daisies that lifts her off the ground and attacks, her lightning legs would be a swarm of angry bees.

Blanka would be Bill, a balding man who launches forward with a fart into a somersault, either up or straight, at his opponents, his electrical attack is simply a joy buzzer.

Dhalsim would be Bald Dave, his Yoga "fire" would be a loogie, his Yoga "flame" would be a belch of bad breath, his long arms and legs would be yo yos attached to his arms and legs.

Zangief would be Paul, a professional wrestler, but his spinning pile driver would be removed as it was too violent for anyone to view, instead it would be a power bomb or something like that.

E. Honda would be Hank, a fat, Southern redneck who fires a shotgun for his hundred hand slap, bull-rushes you headfirst for his sumo headbutt and does an open thigh jump as his last special move.

Guile would be unchanged, because America fuck yeah!

Really, nothing about the characters moves changed, just a few looks, a few sprite animations, oh, sorry, had to remove one thing from "Paul" and had to change a few backgrounds because everyone's in America, not going around the world, but, really, it's the same game, just some small localization changes, nothing major.

I mean, the dialogue is written by a four year old who just learned how to write, but, come on, it's not THAT big of a deal, right?

*Ahem*

As you can see, while the above characters are the same, it's insulting to what you know Street Fighter II really is. And while it would have been hilarious to play the game, I doubt people would have been clamoring for Street Fighter II's remakes that introduced Sagat, Balrog, Vega, Bison, Cammy, T. Hawk, Dee Jay, Fei Long and Akuma as playable characters had the game been localized like that.

It's not the petting mini-game, it's not Soliei getting her supports changed, it's the horrible dialogue, it's the horrible voice acting, it's the bad writing and changes to the characters.

THAT'S what pisses me off, and probably a lot of other people too, about Fire Emblem Fates.

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