The Pair (sic) of Distress #McCann ***PUBLIC INFO POST***
An ancient, rusting BMW pulls into a supermarket car park somewhere in South Wales.
It's equally ancient owner gets out, undoes his trousers, adjusts himself, puts on a tie, then strides purposefully towards the court house across the street.
But rather than the flash of his y fronts, it's his 'El Chapo' moustache that gives him away, for this is heterosexual tenant; Chris Roberts,
Curiously though, Mr Roberts fails to recognise the man he's parked next to; his alleged 'stalker' David Steel. Perhaps this is due to the fact he's more used to looking at pictures of Steel's arse on Twitter.
Of Roberts trolling partner, Serenwyl 'The Pillory' Rhosier, there's no sign.
So terrified is Rhosier of Steel, that she refuses to appear in the same court, and hides out in a separate room upstairs. Somewhat curious behaviour when you consider Steel lives over 300 miles away, has never been to South Wales in his life before being dragged there that morning, and has never had any contact with Rhosier, let alone 'stalked' her.
One can only assume that after writing reams of puerile, poisonous nonsense about Steel on her 'Pillory' blog, she bottled it.
Of Roberts and Rhosier's other alleged 'stalker', Gwen James, there is also no sign. They haven't been able to find her to serve her with their summons, trying to claim expenses from her for a Private Investigator that provided them with the wrong address.
Yes, you did read that right - they haven't been able to find their own stalker. lol
The curious purpose of this particular farrago is to obtain injuctions against fellow anti David Steel and pro Gwen James on behalf of their local pub -'The Farmers Arms' - an establishment Steel has never so much as set foot in.
When asked in court by the Deputy Judge how he could represent The Farmers Arms, Roberts replied with Gerry McCann style insouciance; "You'll have to ask Sewenwyl."
Predictably, no temporary injuction against either party was granted.
Perhaps the pair are confusing England & Wales's legal system with Portugal's, where, as Roberts has reliably informed us, you can be awarded 500,000 Euros (plus interest) for hurt feelings, so no doubt injunctions on behalf of drinking establishments unconnected to you are also easy to come by.
All of which transpired a few weeks ago...
This afternoon Steel found himself back in the same car park, after making another 600 mile round trip to South Wales from the North East; to defend himself against another injunction claim brought by Roberts and Rhosier.
Only today, both failed to show, having sent e-mails to the court this morning withdrawing their applications, perhaps aware now that they would certainly lose their claim, and not wishing to stand in defeat in front of David Steel as victor.
How cynical, how petty.
And how fitting that Roberts has changed the name of 'Pond Appreciation Society' to 'The Big Jameson Appreciation Society'. 'Big Jameson' being a bully David had to have a quiet word with at school.
At least Big Jameson showed up.