deanesmay

Dean Esmay · @deanesmay

14th Aug 2015 from TwitLonger

Why #MGTOW should marry. How many will read this before responding?


A Narrative has been established in a subset of the manosphere that A Voice for Men and/or Paul Elam hatched a deadly plot: having suddenly developed an interest in MGTOW in 2014 because the movement was growing so much faster than interests in Men's Rights was, decided to try to co-opt the movement and make it more mainstream and friendly and appealing by stopping talking about things like hypergamy and by being so friendly you could even say MGTOW can get married if they want! This backfired on them and when after this sudden interest in MGTOW backfired on Elam and co. as everyone recognized their agenda for the moneymaking and power scheme it was, was able to bat off every defense or rebuttal as just cultists rationalizing their dear leader's heinous lies, or somehow trying to turn MGTOW into AVfM turf/property.

Now, you may have heard only some of that narrative. You may have heard all of it. All of it's out there. All of it is also pure unadulterated bullshit. Every. Single. Part.

Since I am married, and am MGTOW, and have understood MGTOW philosophy a good deal longer than most of my critics who had even heard of the term, and I hang with men who have been MGTOW for well over a decade and were there when the term was invented, I fucking dare you to tell me I'm not MGTOW. You don't fucking know why I'm married and you don't fucking know why I stay married, but unless you stupid motherfuckers declare I am required to divorce my wife just to satisfy your own fucking need to have a word mean only what you want it to mean so you can hang out with other guys who agree with you on what the word means can suck my dick. I'm MGTOW, I'm married, and I owe you no explanation on that, it is so and fuck you if you don't like it.

So now, because some of you seem to be so shallow and thoughtless and, dare I say it? Self-centered just exactly like a feminist, here are reasons for MGTOW to be married.
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1) You already are. You and your wife will both lose substantial money and a life you're both very comfortable with if you divorce. And you actually like the bitch.

2) You're destitute and one of the many women who come to the Men's Rights Movement takes you in and cares for you even though you have nothing and on paper look like nothing but a litability. Because she can see what you've been through and wants to help. She has compassion and empathy and there's no way to say she doesn't because you literally are a fucking drain on her, and you can't help it because the state's taking all your money and threatening to jail you if you don't actually produce more than you're making. Oh, and your lawyer tells you if you're married the judge is more likely to let you see your kids some time this year.
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3) You're 45, pretty comfortable and prosperous, and whatever urges you had when you were younger to be a dad or to have a lifepartner to cuddle with every night who had your back when you got sick or lonely, and you'd never even consider marriage. Suddenly a colleague whom you've slept with a few times because she's hot and not too demanding and you've sterilized yourself anyway, informs you that she's got two weeks to live.

4) You find yourself unable to cope with the deep, almost physical yearning for physical love, not just sex but deep sexual nurturing and not just conquest, some real life intimacy, and the friends on Skype and the porn isn't cutting it. And no matter how irrational, you realize you'd love nothing more in the world than to have a child. You hear from no less than 3 guys you know personally that in a specific country they're in, feminism doesn't exist, women actually like men, family life is respected, and the laws do not make financial and custody abuse in divorce favorable to either the man or the woman. That to you seems better for a thousand reasons than to try to just pay for a surrogate, especially after you read some of the literature on single parents and realize that while single dads to tend to be better than single moms on a lot of metrics, the data overwhelmingly affirms that the best outcomes are almost always with children who had two parents who stayed together, or very very close by, to raise them. You decide the odds for you and your child are better in the foreign land than staying here and dealing with surrogacy costs and risks.

5) You're 20 years old and you find out if you marry the 35 year old Cougar who spermjacked you, the state will not come after you for child support and the Cougar actually seems to have a conscience and says she'll marry you because she doesn't want your child support money. Maybe she has deeper motives than that which will hurt you later on but maybe she doesn't, but right now, you're 20, you own nothing of value, you don't even have much of a career, and in this circumstance you just might be able to beat her in court because there's all sorts of things wrong with this picture. But otherwise, you don't hate her, and actually, she's already got $40,000 in equity on her home mortgage, which will be half yours if you just stick around long enough. And she says it'll be a sham marriage, you can sleep with or date anyone you want but she warns things will get fucked if you impregnate another girl, so maybe you think about that but the math on marriage just pushes pretty much to 1 here doesn't it?

6) You're 50 years old. You are buff and actually now totally enjoying that Hot Older Guy James Bond look. Because you kept your stuff and liked making money, you had yourself fixed and slept around a lot but was always just a playboy. Suddenly you get a call from a girl you slept with four or five times, but it was never serious and she never got clingy at all. In fact she'd always stayed a friend even after the sexual charge was 100% gone. Because of your career you both saw each other frequently just in passing and you were both fans of the same sprots team. She also took an interest in your nieces and nephews becuase you always had them around--you never had kids so you intensely enjoyed being an uncle with them and they were over a lot and so all your friends knew them. She like you never had kids, she's led a pretty OK life, but she's dying of cancer. You go to see her. Doctors say she's got 6 months to live. You spend time with her, more acutely aware at 50 than you were at 25 that life is fleeting. As time draws near, the doctors say they think she's got two months but you look at her and you think two weeks might be more realistic or even more humane. Insurance has covered all her bills so far but she's got about $500,000 in assets she's accumulated that she would like to give to your kids because she never had any and she was an only child. She notes that the fastest and cheapest way to make that happen is to marry you since otherwise the government will just take away most of it in estate taxes even if she wills it to you. Even if you don't want it, you realize what you could do for your nieces and nephews if you had that. You check with a lawyer and agree. You also make a friend smile as she dies.

7) The government brings down a bachelor tax so severe that you will lose 3/4ths of your assetts if you do not marry your girlfriend. The same girlfriend you've been with on and off for ten years and who is just as amenable to settling the fuck down as you are.

8) You're 66 years old, close to retiring, and you find out that if you marry that woman you've been living with for 20 years you'll both get better long-term results from your various retirement plants.

9) She straight up raped you and is pregnant. She says "Marry me or I will hound you to the ends of Eternity with family court child support orders."

10) You're in jail. On a false allegation no less. Your accuser has recanted and is deeply sorry but the state will not listen and do not care that she has recanted. She offers to marry you not just as a publicity stunt but also as a way to press hard on the conscience of both appeals judges and the multiple parole hearings you're likely to face in the coming years.

Now you know what? I can keep going. Some of this probably sound more farfetched than others but with only one exception (the bachelor tax) I happen to know people for whom each and every one of those stories is the godawful truth, or something acutely close to it. The good and the bad.

Literally, I know people who all these things have happened to, with some of the details scrambled out of order or shuffled between examples so you can't really guess who I mean.

So you know what? For the longest time I declared myself neutral on the "MGTOW and marriage" debate. I really did. People would constantly accuse me of "siding with Paul" on this or that while rarely noticing that I never said anything counterfactual or hyperbolic (prior to about a month ago, when I left AVfM and began opening my mouth to say what I really thought about things). Sarcastic maybe but even then usually pretty neutral. Even put up with a public shaming/mocking exercise by certain backstabbing people who used to be in the AVfM orbit and then decided the most constructive thing they could do was tear other people down rather than build themselves and others up.

But now I'm free, and I'm tired of hearing lies. Be it known that everything I put forth in "The Narrative" in the opening paragraphs of this are still a compete and total across the board BS narrative put forth by screaming butthurt babies, egotists, and financial hucksters, accounting for still probably only a minority of the MGTOW community.

Even when I sometimes think he's made some bonehead fucking moves, and he can be an incredible asshole when he's not been sleeping or eating right, In my eyes the only person in this entire sordid mess who's actually stayed consistent to his principles or to the principles of MGTOW is Paul Elam.

Now why don't you PigTOW go and actually read that book so many of you shit on just to show the big man who's boss? He really didn't think that many of you would be so childish and neither did I. Well you were that childish, a bunch of punk ass brats. Fix it. Read the fucking book or go die in a fire. You'll never understand MGTOW at all if you keep acting that way.

Signed,

The Married MGTOW who doesn't give a fuck if you like that he's MGTOW. Bitch.

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